"A writer is a person for whom writing is more difficult than it is for other people." --Thomas Mann
Dear Thomas Mann: Thank you for that. And now could you please explain why?
I spend a lot of time worrying about writing - especially while I'm in the process. I'd like to cut it out, because I think it is not only slowing me down, but messing me up. Interfering with what I could be getting down on paper without that fear. Plus, it makes me really exhausting to live with (can you say "needy"?)
I'm not exactly sure how Maegan's pal Fangxiety got into my mix, but he's been there a lot since I became an adult; telling me that what I'm doing isn't good enough. Maybe no one will like it, blah, blah. Oddly, I never worried about that as a kid. It was all about drawing feelings and experiences out of my soul and creating a common meeting ground for other souls. (Translated into Kidspeak: It rocked.) Creating shouldn't be constraining. It should be freeing.
When I was ten years old I moved to Germany, leaving my best friend in Maryland. Her dad was also in the Air Force so it wasn't very long before they'd moved to Iceland. We kept in touch, faithfully, through the mail. And that was saying something, because back then it took anywhere from two weeks to a month and a half to receive a letter.
My friend loved writing too, and had a great talent for it. One of the things she got us doing was writing episodic adventures together. We'd send each other the next chapter until the adventure ended. It started with a comic strip series (illustrated rather goofily by me and beautifully by her--but hey, it was fun) called "The Team." Our main characters were Ropegirl and Flashgirl, and their arch-nemesis was the Egypt Sissy.
|Arch-nemesis, in disguise and inexplicably without a nose.|
|Un-masked . . . AND HIDING A ROPE! (Someone please tell him who he is.)|
|Our Heros, with hands and feet cleverly hidden by sinister mist.|
|Four years later hands and feet come out of hiding. Captain Capricia's face is sliding off her fat head, and Janilene is Queen of the Mer-People, but there is improvement!|
So that's my goal: Smack Fangxiety over the head with the Who-Cares-This-Is-A-Blast-And-I-Want-To-Share-It-With-You stick, and move on ahead. If nothing else I'll have added positive energy to the world, and heaven knows we need some of that.
Here's to dumping the drama and embracing the fun in the new year. And also to going back and watching the old science-fiction shows that inspired my pal and me. Harrison Ford and Dirk Benedict were hot.